That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
