You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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