Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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