i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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