I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
