bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
