Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
