it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
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