whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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