I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The best revenge is premature balding
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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