Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize