Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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