that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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