Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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