break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
