Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize