Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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