when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
