OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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