There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
