if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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