I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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