I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
