True but thats because hes a fetus.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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