I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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