Quick, to the slutcave!
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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