there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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