I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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