I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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