Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
