sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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