Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
