where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
