Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
