when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
