I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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