Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
