Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
