no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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