Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
