Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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