Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
