let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I need to calm my uterus...
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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