Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize