we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
