New invention idea: vibrating tampons
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
pray to the hookup gods
Verdict: uncircumcised.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
