quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
