just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
