Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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