Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry BaMmErKuSh hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(970): View more from Colorado

she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.

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(904): View more from Florida

Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.

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(845): View more from New York

They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.

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(619): View more from California

Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex

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(315): View more from New York

WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i came so hard i kicked through my windshield

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(970): View more from Colorado

Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.

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(512): View more from Texas

Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list

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