it hurts more in the daytime
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
