someone threw a dead crab at me
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize